The Kids Are Alright

The happy family ... "food4horse"!

(Photo credit: occhiovivo)

In the English-speaking world it is a great badge of shame to be still living with your parents as you approach you late 20s/early 30s. I remember the raft of hand-wringing articles that sprang up a couple of years into the recent crisis about college graduates forced by straightened times to move back in with their parents. It was like the world was ending for both parties. Journalists even came up with a name for these unfortunates — boomerang kids. In the Mediterranean world in general, and Spain in particular, there is no such shame. It has never been frowned-upon for adult children to remain living at home with their parents until they themselves got married, and now, with the economic crisis seemingly deepening by the minute, the situation is getting drastic: 80% of young adults under the age of 30 still live with their parents. What are the reasons for this anomalous (to our American/Northern European eyes at any rate) situation?

Let’s talk about those of a cultural nature first and then go onto the economic factors. The Spanish family is famously strong. It is the glue that holds society together and the foundation stone on which the state itself is built. If it weren’t for family unity and solidarity, Spain would have succumbed to widespread social unrest a number of years ago. You’ll hear no complaints from Spanish parents (especially the long-suffering Spanish Mother) along the lines of having the grown-up kids under their feet or wanting a bit of peace and the house to themselves in their old age. Spanish parents adore having their twenty- and thirty-something children around. And they can’t do enough for them. The Spanish Mother being the Spanish Mother (only too delighted to cook, clean, dust, wash and iron for any number of close relatives), the grown-up kids living under her roof receive higher levels of service and care than if they were to relocate to the Ritz in the Paseo del Prado. Typically, adult children are not expected to pull their weight around the house. They are discouraged from pitching in with the cooking or cleaning or other chores; allowing your children to help at home would be a sign of weakness and laziness on the part of the parents. On the children’s part, they see nothing wrong with the arrangement. In Spain there just isn’t the same idea of fleeing the nest as early as possible (me and most of my friends left home at 18, for example) as in other countries. As long as they have the freedom to come and go and if all their friends are doing it why shouldn’t they?

Perhaps being on the receiving end of a pampering at home might just be the only break this current generation of Spanish young adults gets. Times are tough for them. They have no work — over 50% of them are unemployed (this figure hits 80% in some regions). Those that do work are paid a pittance — the average wage for the 18-30 group is €13,600 per annum. They wait longer than their peers in other countries to start their first job (including part-time or weekend work, 23 is the average age). Contracts are short-term and part-time. Spanish young adults are spending more time than ever in higher education, which means they are more highly skilled than ever, but which also means that when they do finally secure employment they are more overqualified than ever. All of which means one thing: whatever about lacking the motivation, they don’t have the cash to put into a house-share.

Perhaps if living with your parents at 28 years of age was as much of a mark of looserdom as in other countries, Spanish kids would have a by-hook-or-by-crook attitude to leaving home as did most young adults I knew when I was young. And perhaps the social acceptability of being unemployed and living at home with your parents would be lessened. At present in Spain, there are so many young people in the same boat that the stigma of being on the dole and living at home that should drive a young person to entertain measures such as starting one’s own business, retraining or even emigrating is absent — something which may explain the net inward migration of 18-30-year-olds into Spain last year. It seems Spanish kids just don’t want to leave the nest.

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About ucronin

Born in the country town of Ennis, Co. Clare, Ireland in 1975, I now live in Madrid with my partner and two young daughters and work in a research institute. While I was always a hungry reader and harboured vague notions of being a writer, as a young man writing was the furthest thing from my mind; after leaving school, I did a B.Sc. in Biotechnology in Galway's NUI, an M.Sc. in Plant Science in University College Cork and a Ph.D. in Microbiology in the University of Limerick, the plan being to dedicate my professional career to scientific research. While having written extensively within my technical scientific field, I had never contemplated becoming a writer of fiction until a road-to-Damascus moment on the N69 between Listowel and Tarbert, Co. Kerry in the summer of 2011. Since then, most of my spare time has been occupied with writing. In whatever other free moments I have, I like to listen to music, play the guitar and garden (which here in Madrid means a lot of watering of plants and spraying for red spider mite). My ambition is to become as good a writer as I possibly can, eventually freeing myself from the cold clutches of science and earning a living through my scribblings. The type of writing that excites me is honest, intelligent, well-constructed and richly descriptive.
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2 Responses to The Kids Are Alright

  1. OMG! I wouldn’t leave either if it was the Ritz! When I was old enough to understand how the laundry, vacuum, lawn mower (etc) worked, I was doomed to use it or lose my comfy home. I left home at 17 with no college education. Back then (20 years ago) It was embarrassing to still live at home, even for me, a woman. Here in the States, the kids come out of college with no work experience (or maybe only from Starbucks) and wonder why they don’t get the 60,000 job. Because college isn’t like work! ! They refuse to do any other job to get the experience they need and complain about it and ask the government for more free stuff like the health care crap that is going on here. Who do you think pays for it you fools? Not your parents! I do! A person that works hard for my 40,000 and I’m considered rich and get no tax concessions.
    Sorry I ranted so bad in your comments section. 😯 You wrote a very good post and I had to respond in kind.

  2. ucronin says:

    Feel free to rant!! Thanks for the praise.

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